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Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons

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Result page:     (18 images)


1. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2018-11-19 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-11-19 Pub. Date: 2018-11-19
Image Number: 175117
Caption: Notification Bloatification. Erica tagged you in their photo album Highlights from the Beet Festival. Cool. You friend Pat just wrote a comment on Zeke's post. Not sure I needed to know that, but okay. Todd and Janelle likes a tweet from Mr. Opinionhorn. I don't even follow that wanker! Millions of people are talking about things! Hi! I'm a notification. Where are you going?
     
2. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2018-09-24 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-09-24 Pub. Date: 2018-09-24
Image Number: 174259
Caption: Eve of Battle. This may be the hardest battle of your lives. It will be hell. It's a sacrifice for future generations. You may be psychologically wounded and not come back the same person. Many of you will not succeed. Your defenders will be attacked while a barrage of violent threats against you goes ignored. Here's your checklist. Follow it closely. Retain a lawyer. Arrange to leave work. Go to undisclosed location. Hire security firm. I wish you godspeed as you come forward with your sexual assault allegations.
     
3. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2017-06-30 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-06-30 Pub. Date: 2017-06-30
Image Number: 160142
Caption: Cults of America. This week: The Market Liberation Army. The M.L.A. is led by the charismatic Charles Mansion, who claims to channel the late economist Milton Friedman. Free your trade and your soul will follow! Members live in a compound called Dow-Jonestown, where they are indoctrined with market fundamentalism. How do we know what to do, O chosen one? Talk to the hand ... the invisible hand! Let it lift your spirit and guide you in the ways of the holy profits. They develop paranoia about those on the outside. The evil minions of the anti-hand are everywhere. We must fight their public schools and post offices! These raiments made from Wall Street Journal editorial pages will protect us from their Socialism rays! Tyranny of the Poor. Reagan lives. Any skepticism is quickly quashed. I've been thinking bad thoughts, o chose one ... like maybe we should do something about global warm - Hush! The market works in mysterious ways. But it will always love you.
     
4. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-06 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-06 Pub. Date: 2017-03-06
Image Number: 155574
Caption: Republicans plan to "improve" Obamacare by ending taxes that fund it. I feel better already! Dump! Confused? Here's how tax cuts for the wealthy will keep America healthy. More rich guys can afford cryogenics, so postwar earth will be repopulated with winners. Welcome to 2053! Follow me to the breeding chamber. More people can buy their way into other countries with civilized health care. Ah, the fjords are lovely this time of year. The poor are inspired to be well. When I win the lottery, I won't be taxed as much! Pop! I have the will to live!
     
5. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2016-01-04 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-01-04 Pub. Date: 2016-01-04
Image Number: 137531
Caption: Patriots … or Owl Qaeda? So 2016 has kicked off with a heavily-armed militia occupying a waterfowl nesting area. Today a wildlife center, tomorrow the White House! The media aren't quite sure what to call them. Following a very peaceful march, the patriot-protester people, um ... threatened to kill anyone who removes them. A little situation brewing in Oregon. This might not be the case for other groups trying the same thing. War on America. Dangerous treasonous radical violent police-threatening terror thugs! In any case, the "patriots" better watch out for the birdwatchers. If they aren't gone by the spring migration, there'll be hell to pay!
     
6. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2015-03-25 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-03-25 Pub. Date: 2015-03-25
Image Number: 124881
Caption: Carl proceeded to brag at length about his career and his children. I could hardly get a word in. Keep the conversation going, find out what he wants … Finally, he stopped. So, what have you been up to? I talked in a disinterested tone while watching my sons play a game at the table. There was a weird silence at the other end. Was he even listening? Then the answer came: Carl let out a moan I could hear plainly, followed by a loud, orgasmic gasp. Uunngh! (This is a long form cartoon. To see next panels, use "Image Number" box at left and enter 124882.)
     
7. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2014-08-03 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2014-08-03 Pub. Date: 2014-08-03
Image Number: 114866
Caption: Quiz Time. Can you identify which of the following are considered First Amendment rights and which aren't? according to U.S. courts? A. Unlimited money given to political campaigns by corporations and shadowy interest groups. Krudd for Senate HQ. B. A corporation's religious beliefs as expressed through insurance benefits provided by a third party. Corp. charter. Contract with insure Co. InsureCo. Employee. Rx. CEO. C. Florida doctors informing patients of the risks of keeping firearms in a home with children. D. Undercover videos made by journalists revealing animal cruelty and other illegal behavior at factory farms. Answer: A & B are protected and C & D aren't, silly!
     
8. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2012-01-01 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2012-01-01 Pub. Date: 2012-01-01
Image Number: 86647
Caption: Slowpoke. The Fallopitarian Church is OUTRAGED that its hospitals and universities are required to insure employees' prostates. The prostate is the DEVIL'S GLAND! This is an attack on religious freedom! But many of their employees see things differently. College of the Holy Ova. I'm not a Falloptarian - I just work here! Are you sure my insurance won't cover a doctor visit for my cantaloupe-sized prostate? SATAN! Pundits try to turn the dispute into an election-year wedge issue. Why is Obama trying to RAM prostates down the throats of the faithful? Prostate-GATE. Obama holds a special "Prostate of the Union" address to defend the policy. When churches enter the public world of business, they have to follow the same rules as everybody else! That's what someone with a prostate WOULD say! Turn off this filth.
     
9. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2011-12-27 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-12-27 Pub. Date: 2011-12-27
Image Number: 89010
Caption: Slowpoke. Makin' It with Mitt. Hi there! I'm Mitt Romney, and I'm a highly successful guy! You too can follow my inspiring, all-American path … if you don't listen to that Soviet-style cheese-rationer Obama! You see, Obama wants to redistribute wealth. That is absolutely not what we did at my leveraged-buyout firm! Bain Capital. Executives. Savings from laid-off workers. we hoovered wealth. Very different. Obama also wants to punish effort. Why, in the 13 years since I've retired from Bain and continued to collect tens of millions, it's taken a lot of effort to keep track of it all! Foom! Money button. Yes, Obama opposed a merit-based society. How dare he think my sons don't merit their $100 million trust.* *True!
     
10. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2011-10-10 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-10-10 Pub. Date: 2011-10-10
Image Number: 89604
Caption: Slowpoke. A Teachable Moment. Lessons for Wisconsin's governor. Math. If you take a hypothetical balanced budget and subtract $140 million in spending on your own dubious pet projects … 0 - 140,000,000 (equals) -140,000,000. You get a big negative number. Philosophy. If a governor intentionally causes a budget shortfall out of some king of "starve the beast" ideology, then it does not follow that public employees are to blame. That's illogical. History. Union-busting has a long history in the U.S., dating back to the industrial revolution. This is simply part of that time-tested strategy favored by moneyed elites. Note to self: After budget fight ends, revise school textbooks. Gov. Scott Walker.
     
11. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2011-01-01 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-01-01 Pub. Date: 2011-01-01
Image Number: 86599
Caption: Slowpoke. GOProeducts tm. With tennis star Maria Sharapova launching her own candy called "Sugarpova," what brands can we expect from the stars of the GOP? Paul Ryan's Suckers for Suckers. They look like a serious lollipop, bit unwrap them and there's nothing there! Big Mitt Chew. The bubble gum that ties your tongue in knots! Heawth insuwanth ... Mmmmf ... Mandathes ... Big Mitt Chew. Newt Loops. Just follow my nose ... Which way the political wind blows! So sweet, you want to cheat on your diet ... for America! Pauly Belly. Civil rights act-free jellybeans from Ron and Rand Paul. Separate bit equal black bean jar.
     
12. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-08-01 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-08-01 Pub. Date: 2010-08-01
Image Number: 90130
Caption: Slowpoke. This week in Celebrity Imitation. True! Lady Gaga's huge, iris-expanding contact lenses have inspired hordes of girls to adopt the doll-eyed look. Corneas scraped raw. When Ashton Kutcher began sporting Spock ears, thousands of dudes joined him. Chicks dig 'em! When Mel Gibson had his neck removed, hicks everywhere followed. It's the new mullet! Suck on this! And Glenn Beck University has spawned a host of copycat institutions. Eduma-catin' University of Your Crazy Aunt. KILL THE LEMURS!
     
13. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-05-10 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-05-10 Pub. Date: 2010-05-10
Image Number: 90118
Caption: Slowpoke. Lots of public service ads use scare tactics to discourage teen pregnancy. We at Slowpoke suggest a positive approach … Welcome, everyone, to the first annual THANK-A-CONDOM FEST! With me is Jim E. Hatt, who will accept the honors on behalf of all prophylactics! Hi, kids! Thanks! Speakers would share inspirational stories ... I'm about to graduate from college std-and-baby-free, and I owe everything to Mr. Hatt and his rubbery ilk! Aw, shucks! An award would be given ... Without you, my night with that hot piece of Italian beefcake would not have been possible. Please accept this golden booty for all your hard work. Just doing my job. ... Followed by a keynote address. As one of our great forecondoms once said, ask not what protection your partner can offer you ... But what you can offer your partner! Thanks!
     
14. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-05-03 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-05-03 Pub. Date: 2010-05-03
Image Number: 90117
Caption: Slowpoke. "Better Stoned Than Boned." January 2011. Today, several states announced to follow California's lead in legalizing marijuana. The reason, according to elected officials, is "so voters don’t notice how much things SUCK." Eyeball Witness News. Let's face it. There are still no jobs, the state is broke, and I'm up for re-election. May as well get folks high as a Georgia pine. State Sen. Chester Wadd (R-GA). Augusta Extra-sticky. "In Arizona, politicians are hoping voters will be too baked to care about cuts in public services, such as the shuttering of highway rest stops." It's all good, man. I'll just to in my pants again. CLOSED. NEXT TOILET 420 mi. High Times. That November ... I'm here reporting live from the polls, where exactly ONE person has shown up to vote. Tell us, who will be our next governor? Governor? I thought I was ordering curly fries!
     
15. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-01-01 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-01-01 Pub. Date: 2010-01-01
Image Number: 86643
Caption: Slowpoke. Millions of Americans are demanding their FREEDOM TO BE SCREWED. Health care reform threatens out way of life! If the' government usurps my right to crushing medical bills, there'll be HELL TO PAY! Militias spring into action. Troops, this act of consumer protection will not stand. Give me denial of pre-existing conditions of GIVE ME DEATH! Please Tread On Me. ... And secession follows! Today, Idaho, Utah, Arizona and the South declared independence from the U.S. claiming "it is our constitutional right to be reamed by corporations six ways from Sunday," the new confederacy calls itself "THE F*@K ME STATES." Civil War. Bit the rebellion soon fragments. Wait a minute. Now that we're the leaders of the F*@K ME STATES, that makes us ... A GOVERNMENT! Holy crap! Let us hope the citizens take up arms against us!
     
16. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2009-04-13 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2009-04-13 Pub. Date: 2009-04-13
Image Number: 91011
Caption: Slowpoke. Small Business Meets The Virtual Vortex. In the beginning, you did your work, and it was good. 4-course meals on a stick. A dozen by noon? You got it. Then you needed a website. Ta-da! 4-course-meals-on-a-stick.com. But that wasn't enough. You needed a blog. This week I'm offering two meals on a stick for the price of one! PUBLISH! Blogger. Next, you needed to join social networking sites to point people to your blog. New blog post about my big sale! http://tinyurl.com/ctd9dq. Then - how to find new friends to follow your social networking feeds? Join UBERFRIENDER, of course! Add uberfriend? Yes. No. With web 2.0 getting so crowded, a new site allows you to post "PLORKS" linking only to your most important updates. Don't miss my tweet from 11:27 today! Plorker. Eventually ... Wait a minute ... I forget what I do for a living!! Meanwhile, in a spacecraft hovering above Earth: HA HA! The humans will soon cease all productive activity and then we can invade!
     
17. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2008-07-21 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2008-07-21 Pub. Date: 2008-07-21
Image Number: 91245
Caption: Slowpoke. Google, Google Everywhere! Google's "Street View" lets you see actual pictures of a given address … Which is kind of cool, but also a little creepy. Google Maps. GASP! They caught my Prius in front of all eight of my lovers' homes! Coming soon: GOOGLE NOSTRIL VIEW. Mr. Perkins. Type in name. Zoom. Zoom more. Mars Lander View. Google. Google. Holy Hale-Bop! Look at this photo the Phoenix just sent back! What the ... Google street view user view. Google. Meta. Charles Alvarez. To be followed by "Person Reading Cartoon About Google Street View Users" view ... Ha ha!
     
18. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2004-01-01 follow 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2004-01-01 Pub. Date: 2004-01-01
Image Number: 92666
Caption: Slowpoke. Inspired by the patenting of the human genome, other companies follow suit. Ladies and gentlemen of the board, I'm pleased to announce that we've successfully won the rights to SNOW! GLOBOPLUNDIMAXX Industries. Snow TM. Pat. No. 54738419163. Or, as it will also be known, the Globoplundimaxx Flake! "Yes, with our climate manipulation technology we now OWN the white Christmas! If people want a magical holiday, they'll have to go through us!" (Sigh) I wish our mommy and daddy could afford snow. Wheee! This is the best Christmas EVER! "We'll sublicense to other nations who can form a cartel to keep prices high!" Oh behalf of all ze ski resorts in ze Alps, please bring ze cost down! Your pleading annoys me. I raise the price to $60 per kilogram! Finland. Sweden. Canada. Russia. Yes, free from the shackles of the public sphere, snow TM can finally bear fruit in the market, benefitting everyone! But our value creation doesn't' end there - we've got a patent pending on the third dimension! Just think of the royalties! Depth TM. Pat. No. 81276341742. GLOBOPLUNDIMAXX Industries.
     
Result page:     (18 images)